On the way home from Chipotle tonight Lincoln dumped a 20 oz. soda on the floor of our Honda Odyssey.
“Lincoln, why didn’t you hold your drink!?”
“Hold ON TO IT next time!!”
“What were you thinking??”
He’d placed the cup in the small cup holder in his booster seat, and it came out as I turned a corner. The van was dark and I couldn’t see his face back in the third row. Did he hear me? Did he care? He doesn’t say much.
The kids were strapped into their seats and couldn’t reach the cup on the floor, and I couldn’t easy pull over. So we drove home while the soda sloshed back and forth on the floor.
After we arrived home, I went inside to grab a towel before heading back to the van. And that’s when I noticed Lincoln. He was still in his seat. The others had gone in the house. He sat there alone in the dark not sure what to do or say. He held his Nintendo and looked down. He finally looked up, and I knew immediately that I’d overreacted.
This is one of those times as a parent I wish I could take a mulligan. If I could rewind the last 20 minutes of the drive home, I would act differently. Maybe I would think before opening my mouth and realize my 6-year old son has felt sick since last night. Of course he didn’t want to the soda to spill so why make him feel worse than he already does?
When I pulled Lincoln aside a while later and told him I was sorry, he didn’t say much before skipping upstairs.
Later tonight I went upstairs to find Luca, Lincoln and Anna on our bed with Kim. I joined them, and we laughed together while the kids had a discussion about their anatomy which lead to more laughter. Kim wants a king size bed so all six of us aren’t all scrunched together.
I felt bad about what I’d said to Lincoln and especially the tone I used. But he was too busy telling stories and giggling to act concerned when I sat down next to him. I ran my fingers through his blonde wiry hair. I kissed his warm forehead, and he looked at me. He didn’t have to say anything this time because his green eyes told me he’d forgiven me.
Maybe one day, Kim will get her king bed. But tonight our queen was the right size.