Church used to be the most relaxing, enjoyable three hours of the week. This was back when Sunday service was about reflection and singing and fellowship. We came home invigorated for the week ahead.
But since we’ve added young children to the mix, church is about as relaxing as a birthday party at Chuck-E-Cheese. Now church is about:
- 45 trips to the bathroom and drinking fountain
- Putting Cheerios in the hair of the lady sitting in front of us
- Making faces at the people sitting behind us
- Giving dad a ‘wet willie’
- Searching for the largest piece of bread from the sacrament tray and yelling “OH YEAH!” when found
- Using dad’s silk tie to wipe boogers
And this doesn’t even get us half way through the meetings. I’m totally worn out before we’ve heard from the youth speaker.
Today we sat on the far left side of the chapel on a short rows second from the front. Sitting on the front row with kids is pure punishment because there’s nothing to cage them in. So we sit one row back which is great for keeping them from escaping to the drinking fountain, but it puts us in direct view of the bishop and other leaders. I can only imagine what he’s thinking as Anna yells “BUTT!” during the passing of the sacrament.
I suppose it’s good for our kids to learn to behave during meetings and get along in close quarters for a few hours. Church gives them a chance to learn about the gospel and interact with friends and teachers. They have the opportunity to speak and say prayers and attend activities and contribute to service projects.
Maybe next week I’ll bring my own bag of cereal. And it will be some of the good stuff.
Like Cap’N Crunch, because I’m going to need the sugar high to keep up with my kids.