Calling the Snickers Hotline

Snickers is one of my favorite candy bars. Last week while at Disneyland, we bought a couple each day to take to the park as a snack. A Snickers just hits the spot when I don’t have time for a full lunch.

While opening a “Fun Sized” Snickers this morning, I noticed a telephone number on the back and decided to give them a call. This isn’t the first time I’ve called a candy company. Experience tells me those who staff these hotlines are probably bored and LOVE to talk about their products.

This time was no exception when I dialed the number and was connected with Terrell from the Mars Snackfood Consumer Care Department.

Terrell: You’ve reached the consumer care department at Mars. My name is Terrell. How can I help you today?

Me: I am a huge fan of the Snickers and have a few questions I hope you can answer.

Terrell: I’ll try my best.

Me: Do you know how many peanuts are in the regular sized Snickers bar?

Terrell: I don’t have that information for the regular sized, King, Fun sized or the Mini. I’ve wondered that myself.

Me: Are you aware of any plans to roll out a Snickers even larger than the King-sized? Maybe you could call it the Emperor or Gargantuan.

Terrell: I don’t know, but I’m happy to make note of your suggestion. You said the Emperor?

Me: Yes, the Emperor or something that sounds big and powerful. What sized Snickers would you recommend I hand out for Halloween this year?

Terrell: Well, that depends on your budget. But I’d suggest the Fun size. Although the elderly prefer the minis because they can stuff a handful in a purse. Diabetics also prefer the mini for a quick boost of energy. You should try our new dark chocolate Snickers.

Me: That’s a good idea. My wife loves dark chocolate. Any other new flavors I should check out?

Terrell: Oh yes. You’ve got to try the new Snickers Rockin’ Nut Road. It has almonds, dark chocolate and a creamy layer of marshmallow. It’s a limited edition run and only available till October 26. You should try it and, if you like it, turn right back around and buy as much as you can because it will only be around for another month.

Me: That does sound tasty. I’m glad to hear you guys haven’t fallen victim to the chipotle fad and considering a chipotle flavored Snickers. Or are you?

Terrell: I’m not aware that we’re doing anything like that.

Me: You’ve been a big help. Is there anything else exciting taking place at Snickers I should plan for?

Terrell: If your spouse enjoys dark chocolate you should have her check out the Dark Raspberry Three Musketeers. That’s one of my favorites.

Me: I will do that. Thanks again.

Terrell: Thank you for calling the consumer care department here at Mars.

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11 thoughts on “Calling the Snickers Hotline

  1. I’m really disappointed that you didn’t find out why the Fun sized Snickers are called “Fun sized.” However, I’m thrilled to learn about the Dark Raspberry Three Musketeers.

    Emperor? Classic.

    My wife eats Snickers in a weird way; the bottom layers first and then the top layer. Or maybe it’s the other way around. I don’t know because I can’t watch her do that to a Snickers. It must be eaten together in my opinion.

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    1. @Ash
      I know I know. I totally blew it by forgetting to ask about the Fun sized. 😦

      I had that question written down but got distracted trying to keep up with his responses as I typed away.

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  2. Are they ‘fun’ sized because you can share with a lot of people and bring a smile to their faces? Just a thought.

    The Rockin’ Nut Road snickers are actuall pretty good. I like the Almonds.

    Can’t wait to hear what hotline you call next.

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  3. “Diabetics also prefer the mini for a quick boost of energy.” They really said that? *headdesk* Sooo wrong.

    You MUST call the Jell-O hotline and ask them what gelatin made of, then blog about it. Please.

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  4. I am so doing that as soon as baseball season is over and the new preimer weeks on NBC, CBS and ABC are over, and when cable starts showing reruns, and when football season ends, and…. I’m probably not going to call.

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  5. Brett, Brett, Brett. You have way too much time on your hands! I thought I heard you were swearing off sugar. I’m glad to hear you still walk on the dark side of sugar highs and hyperactivity!

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  6. “Diabetics also prefer the mini for a quick boost of energy.”

    Actually I have known diabetics who keep one handy for when they need to boast their blood sugar. The carmel is a quick crank up and the peanuts and other sugars take longer to digest.

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