Category: Customer Service

No Coasting Devices allowed

I enjoy coming across awkward signs that exist because one bozo customer tried to pull a fast one. Take this sign near the drive-thru window at Jack-in-the-Box that was plastered next to the “No Smoking” and “Your Comments Welcome” signs:

Walk up guests will not be served at the drive-thru. This includes guests on coasting devices and non-motorized vehicles that have been altered

imageWhat exactly is a “coasting device”? I assume it means a skateboard but that’s more a kick, coast and attempt a “flip the board over” stunt that fails 99% of the time device. Have you ever seen a punk on a skateboard actually land a single trick? I haven’t.

And when is the last time you’ve pulled up to a drive-thru in a non-motorized vehicle that’s been altered? Is this the Fred Flintstone mobile? Or a Razor scooter with a jet engine fastened to the rear? No clue.

I’d love to know what prompted Jack-in-the-Box to print such a sign. I picture some mad scientist floating down to the window via personal jet pack and the poor employee having to decide if that qualifies as a vehicle. So the lawyers got together and came up with a watered down sign that means diddly-squat to the rest of us.

I wish they would include pictures of devices they don’t allow. You know, in case I finally develop that hovercraft I’ve been building in my mind.

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Verizon Store observations

I visited a Verizon Wireless store today. If you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.  Most of the floor space is dedicated to new phones and the employees outnumber the customers 3 to 1. 

Today I wanted to purchase an extended battery for Kim’s Motorola Q. I figured I’d be in and out of the store in under 5 minutes. I was wrong. Here are a few observations from today’s visit to the Verizon store:

  1. It’s All About the Phones – The store’s layout and positioning is geared to sell you a phone. The more expensive phones are up front, close to the register and all are positioned just below eye level making them easy to try out.
  2. Look-a-Like Accessories – The phone accessories are hung below the phones, making them all look alike and hard to reach. Best I could tell, 95% them were cheap phone cases. Also, don’t assume the accessories found under the phone are made for that model. You may have to wander around the store, bending down under each set of phones to find that holster to fit your Voyager.
  3. You’ll Need to Stand in Line – If you’re after a more expensive accessory such as a $49 extended battery, you’ll need to stand in line behind those people who haven’t figured out how to pay a bill online. They write checks, ask insane questions and are in a general state of confusion. 

While waiting in line for my extended battery, one lady had her laptop on the counter trying to connect to the internet. I wondered if she confused this store with Apple “Genius Bar”. Another guy couldn’t figure out how to pay his bill. A Verizon employee was patiently attempting to help him but to no avail. He might have had more luck if the customer wasn’t on a phone call the entire time.

Hey Verizon, how about opening up a line for those who know how to work their phones and pay bills online and just need a fricking accessory? Even better, how about putting the batteries NEAR THE COUNTER so I can grab one, pay and get back to my life?

Then again, maybe I’ll just avoid the frustrations next time by ordering online.

Tale of two automotive service departments

We own two cars: A Honda Odyssey and a BMW 325i. Kim hauls the kids around in the Honda and I pamper the crap out of the BMW during my 1 mile drive to the park and ride each day of the week. Then, on the weekends, I drive it like a bat out of hell.

I’ve had both cars long enough to experience the service departments at each local dealer. And they couldn’t be more different from each other.

I noticed a light out on the instrument panel of the Honda the same day the new transmission was installed. So I took it back to Hinshaw’s Honda to see if they could fix it (the light worked before I took it in for repairs). I waited over 30 minutes in the service area and finally went up to the desk to see if I should come back later. The guy said, “Oh I forgot about you…what did you need again?”

Eventually a service technician escorted me to my car where I showed him the light that was out and this conversation took place:

Honda tech: “Yep, a bulb is out. We’ll have to pull the dash to get to it”

Me: “Wow, pull the entire dash?”

Honda tech: “That’s the only way to get to it. Maybe next time you come in for an oil change. It will take a few hours”

Me: “So I can’t just pull the instrument panel off to reach the bulbs like I did with my BMW? I can feel four screws that should remove the panel”

Honda tech: “Well….it takes special tool to remove those”

Me: “Like a Torx screwdriver?”

Honda tech: (visibly annoyed) “Those will release the whole dash. Most people wouldn’t attempt that”

Me: “I’ll search for instructions on the Honda forums. Thanks for your help”

I got in my van and drove home in a very grumpy mood having wasted an hour of my Saturday morning dealing with people who assume I know nothing about my car.

And that is the biggest difference I’ve noticed between Honda and BMW service departments. BMW assumes I’m a smart owner and doesn’t treat me like an idiot, whereas the Honda dealer believes I’m barely qualified to pump my own gas.

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Honda Odyssey back in business

We bought a Honda Odyssey just over three years ago and have enjoyed it a lot. It holds the four kids, our dog and piles of kid related stuff that I don’t understand. I don’t understand why my three year old daughter needs three pillows, two dolls and a Nintendo DS to make a trip across town. But I’ll leave that blog post to Kim.

But over the past few months our Odyssey would shift abruptly from first into second gear. It become increasing worse until this past week when it would not engage 2nd gear at all from a cold start. I took it to an independent Honda specialist called Auburn City Import, who diagnosed a major problem with the transmission. Bad news. But the service manager informed me that Honda had issued a warranty extension on our transmission and it would be fully covered at the local Honda dealer. He told me to expect to be quizzed and basically hassled. I asked him who he would recommend I talk to at Hinshaw’s Honda and he gave me the name, John Matteson, who is a service advisor.

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I called John and told him about the problem and asked when he could take a look at the van. I took it in the next morning and he quickly diagnosed the same problem Auburn City Import did. At this point I assumed that I’d be barraged with questions about how I had the van serviced, my driving habits and the like. But that never happened. John turned the monitor screen to me which displayed the transmission warranty extension sent to all Honda dealers and said, “We’ll take care it for you, no charge”. He ordered the transmission that day and installed it the next. We had some other maintenance performed at that time but the $5000 transmission replacement was done at no cost. I feel very lucky because we have 107,000 miles on our Odyssey and the recall is good up to only 109,000 miles. Had we taken another trip to Utah to see family we would have been outside the warranty extension restrictions.

I am very impressed with the high level of service John provided me and will return to Hinshaw’s the next time I’m in the market for a minivan. We took our van for a drive tonight and it’s much improved. It drives as well as it did nearly three years ago. I had the front brakes replaced too and it sure feels a lot more secure. I hope to get another couple of years out of it.

This specific problem affects the following Honda vehicles with automatic transmissions.

1999-2001 Honda Odyssey

2000-2001 Accord

2000-2001 Prelude

You can find the details of this Service Bulletin 02-061 at this link which opens a PDF.

Calling the Starburst Candy Helpline

Ever since I was a kid, I’ve loved Starburst candies. When my mom was brave enough to take me along to the grocery store, she’d let me choose a treat if I behaved. At those rare times I’d select a pack of Starburst. As a kid, it felt like I was getting a lot of bang for the buck because each “fruit chew” was individually wrapped. I could eat a few now, stash the rest in my pocket where they’d stay warm until I needed my next sugar high.

Fast forward a few decades to a time where my mother no longer takes me shopping and I have to secure my own stash of Starburst. These days, the only time I see Starburst are at Halloween and occasionally in the candy bowl at work. So today, while I was opening a “twin pack” of individually wrapped chewy goodness, I noticed these words on the back of the wrapper:

Questions or Comments? Call 1-800-551-0683

Since I wasn’t busy at the time I figured I’d give them a call and see if someone could answer several Starburst related questions I’ve had for years. I dialed the number and made my way through the maze of options including one to learn more about “the Mars policy concerning animal research”. Do they really test new candy on animals? I don’t plan to dig too deep there.

I eventually found myself on hold, waiting for the next available Mars consumer candy representative.  After a few minutes, a polite guy named Cameron came on the line and was more than willing to field a few questions. Here’s how it went down:

Cameron: Thank you for calling the consumer division of Mars candy. How can I help you today?

Me: I’m looking for someone to answer a few Starburst related questions. Are you the guy?

Cameron: Yes, I can help you. What questions do you have?

Me: I love Starburst candies but my favorite flavor is strawberry. Is there a way to determine if a package is loaded with mostly strawberry chews? I’ve tried holding a pack up to the light, but that hasn’t worked well and I always feel a little cheated when a pack is mostly filled with yellow and oranges.

Cameron: There’s really no way to tell. Each pack or bag is filled based on a ratio of flavors. Would you like me to find out what that ratio to flavor is?

Me: Yes, if it’s not too much trouble. (I’m put on hold for about 45 seconds)

Cameron: The current flavor ratio is 25% per flavor. The original packs contain orange, lemon, strawberry and cherry flavors. But some packs or bags may contain more or less than 25% because they are placed in a large vat and mixed together before packaging.

Me: That’s really cool. Do you know if there are any plans to discontinue the yellow ones. They are my least favorite.

Cameron: At this time, I’m not aware of any plans to discontinue the lemon flavored chews.

Me: Is there a way I could buy a bag full of only the strawberry?

Cameron: No, not at this time, but you’re not the first to ask. I will pass that suggestion on to our marketing group who values the input from loyal customers like yourself.

Me: Thank you. How would I go about suggesting a new flavor?

Cameron: You can tell me and I’ll pass it on for you.

Me: Cool. I’d like to suggest a lime flavored Starburst.

Cameron: We do have a lemon-lime in the “Baja pack”, but not lime only. I’ll pass that on to our marketing department.

Me: Do you have a lot of people call up asking about Starburst?

Cameron: I wouldn’t say a lot but we have a few who call us with questions.

Me: You’ve been very kind. Thank you for your help. That’s it for now.

Cameron: Thank you for calling the consumer division of Mars Candy and I hope you continue to enjoy Starburst candies.

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Webkinz leaves bad first impression

We bought a Webkinz animal for each of our three oldest children. If you’re not familiar with Webkinz, the unique feature of this toy is the online integration. Basically, one buys an animal for about ten bucks and then goes online to register, adopt and name their pet. It reminds me a bit of Animal Crossing (Which our kids and their mom enjoy on the Nintendo DS) where there are places to see and activities to join in which earn Webkinz money which can be used to buy things in this virtual world.

On Christmas day one would assume the Webkinz website would be overloaded with kids trying to register their new pets. But we tried anyway and ran into this message:

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We decided to come back the next day and ran into the same problem. We’ve been trying to login to the site for four days now and I finally got all three pets registered, adopted and named tonight but not without more hassle.

Near the end of the registration process, I was presented with the screen below which asks me to “Enter the letters” I see in this image. Do you see any letters in the the box? If you look closely, the letter are supposed to appear in the rectangular box, but they didn’t appear until I clicked on the back button, entered in the “Webkinz Secret Code” and returned to this screen. I had to do this several times for all three pets. I’ve run into confusing “captcha” screens but I’ve never been presented with a ghost “captcha”.

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Luca has been checking out the Webkinz world for the past hour or so and seems to really like it so it appears the inconvenience was worth it. But it doesn’t leave a good impression.

Webkinz had to know there would be a rush on its website on Christmas day. Technology such as AmazonS3 is available to resolve scalability issues. Webkinz isn’t run by two teens in their basement trying to get the business off the ground. They are owned by Ganz which is good sized toy company. There is no excuse for a four day outage like this.

What could Webkinz do to soften the blow to our kids? How about extend the subscription (the first 12 months is free) by 6 months? Or give them an extra 100 bucks in Webkinz cash. Something that shows they care about the frustration they caused.

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The Fry’s Return adventure

I bought a VGA converted at Fry’s last night. When I got home I opened it up to find a few problems:

  1. Inner box was torn
  2. None of the items (cables, converter, manuals) were in bags
  3. The converter box itself had scratches on the top and bottom
  4. The remote control was missing
  5. Batteries were missing

It was clear that Fry’s had sold me a used product. So I drove back to Fry’s and parked about a half mile away. I entered the store and stood in the return line until a man dressed like a Mormon missionary asked me to follow him back to his station.

At this point the following conversation took place:

Fry’s Missionary: So you want to return this?

Me: Yes, I do.

Fry’s Missionary: Is something wrong with it?

Me: Yes, several things. I bought a used converter unit. The inner box is damaged, the converted is scratched, and the remote and batteries are missing.

Fry’s Missionary: OK. But other than what you mentioned, it’s working properly?

Me: *SIGH*

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It’s Quitting Time

A former manager of mine once told me that how efficiently a company handles paychecks and expense report is a good barometer of how they treat their employees. I’ve found that to be true throughout my career, but I’d like to add a corollary to that saying that goes like this:

The degree a company cares about its customers is directly proportional to how easy they make it to cancel serviceimage

Take Netflix for example. This is a company that is known for its excellent customer service. I once mailed a DVD that never made it back to them and they didn’t hassle me by making me fill out forms or asking me to pay for the lost DVD. They just took care of it. Look at how their site is designed. It’s user friendly and works the way you think it should work. Few sites work as well or are as enjoyable as the Netflix website. Yet, they make it EASY to cancel their service. It’s not hidden under numerous menus nor do they make me pickup the phone, sit on hold and then have some idiot attempt to sell me a cheaper service. Remember the famous “Cancel AOL” phone call? 

One of the worst experiences I’ve had was trying to cancel our TruGreen ChemLawn service. I’d call to cancel yet they’d show up and spray our lawn the next month and leave a bill for fifty bucks on our door. They were terrible and I’ll never use them again.

I wish every company made it easy to cancel service. If I can order service online, I should be able to cancel it online as well. Nice job, Netflix.

Does your company make it easy for customers to cancel service?

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Why is it nearly impossible to return software?

I bought a scale a few weeks ago at Fred Meyer. When I got it home, it didn’t work so I returned it for a full refund. Same thing happened with a portable blow-up mattress we bought at Costco. We had no trouble returning both items.

Compare that with purchasing software. You’d better do your homework because returning software for a refund is nearly impossible if the box has been opened. I suppose this has something to do with the fact that it’s easier to make a digital copy of a CD/DVD than to replicate a blow up mattress. But it can still make for a disappointing buying experience.

For example, I purchased a game called ShawdowRun that is supposed to run on Windows Vista. In fact, according to the fancy box, it requires Vista to run. Well, I tried installing it four times on Kim’s Vista machine with no luck. It would appear to install correctly but the game wouldn’t launch. Never mind this is a game released by Microsoft Game Studios.

But because I’ve opened the box, I can only return it to the store for the same item which does absolutely no good. I guess I could sell it on eBay for less than I paid for the game, but that’s not the point. I bought an item that was advertised to work, yet I have no recourse that remedies the problem.

The whole thing  leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I didn’t pirate the game. I didn’t make a copy of the game and try to return it. Software return policies assume I’m a criminal instead of treating me like a customer.

Costco can figure out a fair way for their customers to return computers and big screen TVs within a reasonable amount of time. If Costco can do this for large ticket items, why can’t software companies come up with a reasonable return policy?

I’m to the point where I just don’t trust much software anymore which means I’ll only buy programs I must have, like Turbo Tax, and continue to look for freeware options.

Curious Sign at Fred Meyer

I went to Fred Meyer last night to pickup a few items including a small light for a children’s night globe. This Fred Meyer has a regular grocery store area and larger department store area. It’s similar to a Super Target or Super Wal-Mart only not quite so large.

I like Fred Meyer because it’s clean, the people are nice, they have a good produce section and I know my way around the aisles. I can find the peanut butter, popcorn, Diet Coke and string cheese with ease!

So last night I located the small light section in the grocery area of the store. I wasn’t finding the light I needed but I noticed a hand-written sign that said:

You can find more lights in the Electrical department

I was happy they had more lights in another area of the store, but it would have been just as easy to include the aisle number on that sign, right?

The electrical section is mixed in between the paint and the lamps areas. Although I’m very familiar with the store layout, it still took some time to find where the lights were.

As luck would have it, after I found the area, I reached in my pocket and realized I’d left the tiny light at home and couldn’t recall the model/size I came for. Total bummer.

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